Hells yeah, its FRIDAY!!!! I'm gonna get tore up this weekend, since I didn't really celebrate my birthday last weekend, this weekend is gonna be my party weekend!

- Ethan Hawke is still bitching about his divorce with Uma Thurman. He's saying it affected his performance having to deal with it, blah, blah, blah. I think he is just pissed because her career is taking off, and his is well, sucking.

- George Clooney says he wants to wait to have children. He feels he needs to find out if he can sustain a lasting relationship, and also he cites his crazy work schedule. However, he needs to remember he is getting old, and unless he wants to be like 80 with kids, he needs to hurry the hell up or just forget about having kids all together. In fact, how about he just not have any. That would be a much smarter choice.

- Ok, that Simon Cowell dude is seriously fucked. I mean he is NUTS. He just said that he doesn't understand the whole Beyonce thing. He says she can't sing and doesn't have a nice body. Then he goes on to defend Ashlee Simpson by saying he doesn't understand what the big deal is, and why should you do a substandard performance if you sound better with the vocals. God, I wish he would go back to fucking Europe and stay there, he is such an idiot.

- Ben Stiller wants to do a play about an interracial love triangle in small town America. Um, huh? Why? Maybe he wants more street cred or something?

- Chris Rock says that if Jamie Foxx doesn't win the Oscar, he will steal one for him. That's nice, lets not perpetuate black stereotypes or anything. I wonder if there will be riots in the street is he doesn't win as well? Could it be that if he doesn't win its because wasn't *gasp* the best actor this year? It is possible ya know.

- Didn't Gwyneth Paltrow talk about being one of those moms that won't have like all kinds of nannies and shit? Well, so much for that. She is going to start filming her new movie in March.

- Seal is starting shit with rapper 50-cent. He blasted 50 recently saying that all he does is tell people to get rich or die trying, and he fills his video with cars and "hos". Seal better watch what he is saying, because 50 will cap his ass, LOL.

- Pierce Brosnan says his wife helped him through getting cut as James Bond. He says it took a toll on him emotionally, but his wife was there to comfort him and finally tell him to move and get over it. Yep, thats what wives are for, to tell there whinny millionaire actor husbands to get over it!

- J-Lo, oh damn, I mean Jennifer Lopez says that she loves to stay in and just chill. She says she likes to have friends over and watch Sex and the City or sit by the pool and just chat. She also says that she loves to watch comedies and her favorite is Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo, and that it kills her everytime. You know, I actually have to say I am liking J-lo more and more these days. I love her new song and video, and also, that movie is one my favorites as well.

- Beyonce was asked to host a party, but wanted a special kind of Indian curry to be served by her favorite chef. Only problem was that the chef was in England, the party planners tried to talk her out of it, until they finally gave in and spent the $7,000 to fly in the special curry.

- Fergie, the chic from the Black Eyed Peas is said to have had a boob job, brow lift, and a nose job. I can't upload the side by side pics, but they are out there.

- Oh and thank you to those lovable Christians, for letting us know that Sponge Bob is a big ol' homo. James Dobson of Focus on the Family issued a warning to Christians that Sponge Bob was gay. I personally had no idea, and I know about ALL the gay cartoon characters. Man, I don't know how they got the dirt to out him, but I wish I had their source. It would make dating so much easier if I knew who all the big homos were.

- Christina Ricci uses Preparation H. Why? No, not for hemmroids, but to keep from getting bags under her eyes. She always keeps a tube of in the fridge.

- Britney Spear's new mansion is a shit sty. Apparently she lets all her dogs just piss and poo all over the carpets. She doesn't use any cleaner she just kinda dabs it up. Kevin's closet is filled with dog poo. (Where else would the dogs think to shit, other than the closet full of baggy pants and wife beaters?) So this brings us to our newest question, does Brit's rash come from frequent use of public bathrooms, or from copious amounts of dog feces?

- David Hasselhoff reveals that he turned down hiring Leo Dicaprio for a baywatch role. Leo is thanking god everyday for not looking hot enough in red swim trunks.

- Some woman is claiming that Bill Cosby drugged and groped a women in his Philly home last year. No word yet if any pudding was involved.

- I got this story from several people yesterday, but apparently while Reese Witherspoon was filming Vanity Fair a frog jumped into her blouse and had to be "removed" by a frog handler. A frog! In her boobs! Rescued! Oh the horror!

- Victoria Gotti might on the way out of Star magazine. Her column has been missing for some time, and there have been rumors of yelling matches with Bonnie Fuller. Nothing official has been said yet.

- Jenna Bush gave the sign for the U. of Texas bullhorns, but it also means bullshit in sign language and is also a reference to Satan in some circles. I kinda think both were fitting for the occasion.

- Cadbury has made a chocolate Jennifer Lopez, for sale at the wax museum Madame Tussauds. Um???

- Usher is apparently furious with J-Lo's new song "Get Right" because he says he recorded it first or something. He is such a whinny little twat.